What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

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Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

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Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

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Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

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Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

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Make Nazis afraid again!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

TEXT:

My religion teacher said that there are no atheists because in order to reject God, you must first have a concept of God, and if you have a concept of God, you are not an atheist. In what way is this true, if at all? Why?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Why is the world male-dominated?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

What is your age now, and what age do you prefer to stay at forever?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

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At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

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In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

What is the cost of living in Sweden as a family?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!